Aviators and a Camera

I approach the intersection of 36th Street and Madison Avenue frankly a little clueless. Drew asked that I meet him here but I’ve never met Drew and therefore have no idea what Drew looks like or what …

And then, the signal changes and I am forced to stand on the corner staring ahead at a hearse. Yes, a large, black, antique hearse just waiting for me on the other side of the intersection. It’s a Monday morning not long after most working people in New York have punched in at an office – stragglers still pass me, looking hungover and unsure of whether or not they are ready for a Monday! What am I doing with my Monday? I’m about to cross this intersection and, I guess – get in a hearse. I’ve never been more unsure of what will happen next than I am at this minute!

I see the walk signal and knowing there’s no time like the present – I start walking. Drew steps out of the hearse and greets me. I get in what has to be the most comfortable and inviting hearse I’ve ever ridden in. “Wait,” I think “compared to what? How many times have I actually ridden in a hearse?” But I have [ridden in a hearse before] and this is [the most comfortable and inviting hearse I've ever ridden in] and before I know it we’re off. Stares and all.

This hearse, expertly maneuvered by Drew through the streets of NYC – and that’s saying something since driving in NYC is a competitive sport that many will never win – invites stares like I’ve never experienced. Unlike a hearse actually used for funerals, these windows are not blacked out. I can see everyone we pass and everyone we pass can see me. Note to future tourists traveling with Dead Apple Tours: accept the fact that people will stare at you as if more than just your shirt is on backwards! In fact, one woman runs into a light pole because she is staring at us in this hearse!

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